BREAKING NEWS

Shark Attack on Sunset Boulevard
In quick succession, five agents in five weeks have passed on representing me. They all used essentially the same reason:  "We have too many blondes with far more credits who are just like you." More »

Pretending It's Chocolate
I don't have 'showmances' as a rule. Getting involved with your romantic opposite is not only messy, it is a breach of a professional relationship—one which inevitably interferes with your performance. More »

Casting Myself
I was willing to make one last big effort, and go out with a bang, so to speak. Making a feature film could be just that: One that I wrote and in which I appeared as the lead. More »

Puffing on Illusion
Some people do yoga. I hang out in a little cigar shop on Melrose Avenue. I come here to center myself, to think, to contemplate the meaning of my existence, and existence in general. More »

One Dream, or the Other
My sister Kiki is two and a half years younger than I am. Despite the difference, it always felt as though we were the same age because we were inseparable. More »

Loss of Faith
I used to not believe in theater. You may ask, what is so scary about that? But when you've been loving something with your entire existence for your whole life, doubting it is not only upsetting, it's debilitating. More »

A Chance to Kick Up My White Boots
We're at Mile High Stadium in Denver. At that moment I was standing in a long line of hundreds of pretty girls, all waiting anxiously.  More »

War Stories
"I have to warn you, it's not just modeling," she said. Wow, I thought, stretching all five-foot-two of me. I look like a prospective model? Now this is new. "He wants you to sell things out of a cigar tray." More »

Salt in My Eyes
"You remember John, don't you?" Of course I did. How could I forget the man my grandmother referred to as "salt of the earth," who had been my uncle's best friend for 40 years—and who was now a successful Hollywood producer. More »

Young Face, Old Soul
"I simply cannot figure out where to place you," he says. He then speaks words that continue to haunt me: "You're like a young face with an old soul." I stare at him blankly. What am I supposed to make of that? More »

Bukowski and Popsicles in a Hollywood Meeting
I'm sitting across from one of the biggest directors in Hollywood, and he's trying desperately to remember the name of a film.  "Carla?  What's the name of that picture?  You know, about the pirates?" More »

Setting Me Free
Something was really wrong. I felt disturbed and abandoned by my own body. Please make this stop. I pleaded and then cried in the hallway. Alone. Panic gripped me. More »

One Child's Eyes
I slowly realize my whole life is about acting. Every day is 24/7 auditioning, acting class, new headshots, meeting with 'producers'—and waiting tables to pay for all of it. What happened to 'my life'? More »

Dating Famous
She bats her perfectly mascara'd eyelashes, as if she'd been planning this moment her whole life. She then asks my boyfriend for his autograph. Great. Models are fighting over my boyfriend. Right in between the cookbooks and self-help. More »

Instincts
I finally drummed up the courage to ask him what I really wanted to know: Why he had cast me out of all the dozens of young women he'd seen at the casting calls. "Because you were the only one who trusted yourself in the audition," he said. More »